From the Mind of Master Imaginationist Crystal Connor ~"A Trusted Name in Terror."

The Darkness, Artificial Light, In The Valley of Shadows

Monday, July 12, 2010

The reason I hate the summer!

So I get up this morning super excited because I'm going to spend my 2nd day at a street fair because I had soooo much fun the day before. I open my front door to find I've been trapped inside by a huge spider wed and a giant spider! I slammed the door and resisting the urge to Dial 911 I started flipping thru my phone to see who can rescue me. I end up running to my bedroom window and start screaming for help. My self proclaimed "red-neck" neighbor jumps over my fence shotgun in hand and runs to the window to see who he can shoot.

Thru my hysterical tears I tell him about the spider that's trying to break in to my house and kill me...and to his credit he kills the spider opens the door and pours me a glass of water and says, "Yeah he was pretty big but I kilt it so your ok now." And he kept patting on the back and telling me I was ok now "cuz its dead." And he didn't even laugh at me.

He stays with me until I leave the house and even walked me to my car and tells me if I need anything he's just next door, I don't even want to know what my other neighbors thought at the site of the two of us. So I spend the day outside, eating too much junk and spending too much money and made it home without incident.

About an hour ago I get out of the shower and on the wall above my couch is another spider bigger than before. So I throw on a coat over my towel and run my naked ass next door, He gives me a tee shirt big enough to cover everything and comes over to my house to take care of the other spider...who by this time moved from the spot on the wall, so he had to look for it and thank God he found it and destroyed it. He shrugged his shoulders and offered..."well everyone is afraid of something." As I started to cry. He said "You know where to find me" as he left and said he would be back tomorrow to spray around my house for bugs.

Thank God because its the bugs that I hate most about summer.

1 comment:

  1. He may not have laughed but I will HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I love you sis and stop killing my friends!!!