From the Mind of Master Imaginationist Crystal Connor ~"A Trusted Name in Terror."

The Darkness, Artificial Light, In The Valley of Shadows

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Moive Night with Crystal

Hellooo Peoples!

So last night I hosted my 1st movie night with friends there were so many men in my house I thought I had died and gone to Heaven...or maybe found a secret section of Hell reserved for only for the people who are really good when there being really bad =D I'm not sure what happened to all my double X chromosome friends who RSVP'd and didn't show up but for those who did...you rock!

We watched Eden Lake which was reviewed last week, and basically, like I said...that movie Rocks! Smoking hot Sami Chohfi, lead singer for the Blue Helix showed up with horror movie buff, Curt MacCormack the bands drummer(who fucking rocks btw)and he didn't even see the ending coming!

With most of my client's summering in Europe, Seattle Crystal Concierge being nearly self sufficient, the reworking of The Darkness, writing the sequel, re-reading and picking my favorite short stories and writing new ones for...And They All Lived Happily Ever After, and of course entering tons of writing contest I can spend days and days happily locked inside my home playing music loud enough to block out the summer sounds of birds signing, children playing, dogs backing and my Psycho Suzie neighbor up staying up for days and days at a time just writing and writing.

But for some reason this horrifies and bewilders the newest members of my circle of friends..my family and friends who know how I am when I'm writing are use to it and pretty much wait for me to emerge from my writing hovel, but these newbies call me constantly show up at my house unannounced to make sure "I'm ok" (grrrrrrr)

So to appease my friends who have the ability to show up at my door anytime they want to I decided to host a movie nite once a month but judging those who were in attendance verse those who were invited I might have to amend my original once a month hang out with friends nite to twice a month.

Because the movies I enjoy are so brutal in nature I think I'll do movie night for the guys and maybe a spa nite for the girls HUGE emphasis on spa nite. I had sooo much fun last night surrounded by too much food, super chill people and watching a movie with such a unhappy ending that I might have to wait awhile for spa nite...if it ain't broke don't fix it, right?

Til next time guys!

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

DVD Pick of the week: Eden Lake



Eden Lake

Plotline: When a young couple goes to a remote wooded lake for a romantic getaway, their quiet weekend is shattered by an aggressive group of local kids. Rowdiness quickly turns to rage as the teens terrorize the couple in unimaginable ways, and a weekend outing quickly becomes a bloody battle for survival.

Scariness Factor: Is cranked way up! This is got to be one of the disturbing & frightening movies I have recently seen because the monsters in this movie are children and the things they’re doing is unbelievable.

Gross-Out Factor: N/A

Complaints: None

High Points: What I liked the most about Eden Lake is that, not your average run-of-the-mill city slickers lost in the woods movies, is that most of Eden is shot during the day. The breath taking beautify of the wilderness offers a stark contracts to these children’s wild and brutal behavior. Another thing that director James Watkins does really well is point out how much Janie (our leading lady) loves kids and when she has to defend herself from them, even though she doesn’t have a choice, it doesn’t sit well with her. One of the closing lines in Eden Lakes is “but they’re just children.” Which they are and that’s what makes Eden Lake all the more chilling.

Stars: 5 Stars

Where I rented it: Blockbuster

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

My world from the view from the tip of my pen...

So for the most part I have spent every last ounce of my free time, of what has been a gorgeous summer so far, indoors writing...and I really wouldn't have it any other way. I've just finished a new short story for my anthology "...And they all lived Happily Ever After" and am working on another one.

The one I've finished is called "The Monster" and I'm not sure if I like they way it ended so I'm going to read it again next week and see if there is anyway I can make it stronger. The one I am working on is called "Amber's New Friend" and I have having a fucking blast with that one! I am super excited about the shorts that will make up "...And they all."

Things with Artificial Light are coming along really well I'm really having a good time with Artificial and can't wait to see how it turns out. Things are kinda of slow with the reworking of The Darkness but honestly I wish things were moving much faster than they are...oh well there's not too much I can do about it so I'm going to try not to drive myself insane. I'll be posting the DVD pick of the week tomorrow and it's one of the most fucked up movies I've seen to date, so don't forget to check back in for the review.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

DVD Pick of the Week: House of the Devil



House of the Devil
Winner of the 2009 “Best Feature Film” for the Birmingham Sidewalk Moving Picture Festival, winner of the 2009 “Festival Trophy” award for Screamfest and winner of the 2010 “Producers Award” Independent Spirit Award.

Plotline: In the 1980s, college student Samantha Hughes takes a strange babysitting job that coincides with a full lunar eclipse. She slowly realizes her clients harbor a terrifying secret; they plan to use her in a satanic ritual.

Scariness Factor: Is off the scale! It’s extremely creepy and suspenseful in the way of John Carpenter’s 1978 Halloween, the 1st Friday the 13th on Crystal Lake, and Fred Walton’s 1979 When a Stranger Calls! There are some really good “jump” scares and if you’re like me, you’ll be screaming warnings to the babysitter not to go in that damn attic!

Gross-Out Factor: There is only one part in House of the Devil that is kinda gross, it’s towards the end of the movie during the ritual.

Complaints: N/A

High Points: The House of the Devil was filmed in 2009, but watching it you’ll swear it’s an 80’s horror film. To help with the illusion of time travel there are a couple of actor’s that starred in older horror films that we all grew up watching and loved.

Overall: There is a reason why House of the Devil is an award winner, this is a scary film with a well thought out plot and the fact that the film makers takes us back in time a full decade, with feathered hair, high waste jeans, smoking inside restaurants and a tape player walk-man to do so is flawless.

Stars: 5 Stars!

Where I rented it: Blockbuster

Monday, July 12, 2010

The reason I hate the summer!

So I get up this morning super excited because I'm going to spend my 2nd day at a street fair because I had soooo much fun the day before. I open my front door to find I've been trapped inside by a huge spider wed and a giant spider! I slammed the door and resisting the urge to Dial 911 I started flipping thru my phone to see who can rescue me. I end up running to my bedroom window and start screaming for help. My self proclaimed "red-neck" neighbor jumps over my fence shotgun in hand and runs to the window to see who he can shoot.

Thru my hysterical tears I tell him about the spider that's trying to break in to my house and kill me...and to his credit he kills the spider opens the door and pours me a glass of water and says, "Yeah he was pretty big but I kilt it so your ok now." And he kept patting on the back and telling me I was ok now "cuz its dead." And he didn't even laugh at me.

He stays with me until I leave the house and even walked me to my car and tells me if I need anything he's just next door, I don't even want to know what my other neighbors thought at the site of the two of us. So I spend the day outside, eating too much junk and spending too much money and made it home without incident.

About an hour ago I get out of the shower and on the wall above my couch is another spider bigger than before. So I throw on a coat over my towel and run my naked ass next door, He gives me a tee shirt big enough to cover everything and comes over to my house to take care of the other spider...who by this time moved from the spot on the wall, so he had to look for it and thank God he found it and destroyed it. He shrugged his shoulders and offered..."well everyone is afraid of something." As I started to cry. He said "You know where to find me" as he left and said he would be back tomorrow to spray around my house for bugs.

Thank God because its the bugs that I hate most about summer.

Monday, July 5, 2010

DVD Pick of the Week:If you call in the next 15 minutes we’ll even throw in…

As I said when I reviewed a movie called “I Sell the Dead” I do not like my horror & comedy blended together. With that being said David Bruckner’s, Jacob Gentry and Dan Bush’s 2007 The Signal is a phenomenal movie.

What sold me is The Signal is told is within three genres, which they brake-up into “Transmissions” and the end result is three little movies that when put together tell a whole viciously brutal story.



The 1st part of Signal is straight up Horror and it’s told in Horror’s perfect form. The opening scene looks a 70’s horror movie, and just as your about to look at the cover of the DVD to make sure you’ve got the right movie we find out it’s a movie there’re watching because all of a sudden the TV loses its signal.

We’re introduced to Maya & Ben two people who are clearly in love…but we find out the woman is married and Ben is not her husband. After realizing the time Maya tries to call her husband but her phone is dead and so is Ben’s house phone, so she flees from his apartment to race home. On her way she notices that things are “off” somehow and when she gets home we see why she’s having an affair. Her husband Lewis is large, brooding, and has a short temper and it’s clear she is afraid of him. It’s a slow and intense build-up before we’re thrown into full-blown madness and learn the signal on the TV is a transmission and it’s being broadcast over every single TV, radio station, and phone. And it’s turning men into monsters.

The 2nd part of Signal is comedy. It’s so over the top, dark and vulgar it’s disturbing, and it’s also the most violent and gory part of this film. You guys all know that I am not a big fan of gore for gore’s sake but by offsetting the outrageous satire with the excessive violence is what sold me. And sold me in a big way.

The last part of Signal threw me for a loop. It’s scary, suspenseful, and somehow romantic. Actually The Signal’s under current is a love story, the whole movie revolves around Maya and the two men who love her. Her husband’s love has turned dark, obsessive, and dangerous while her lover Ben’s love is pure, patient and romantic. All throughout Signal we watch Maya and Ben have flash backs of each other and we follow their horrific journey as they to try and find each other in a horrific world that has gone utterly mad.

This movie really worked for me. I really like the way Signal break between genres to let you know there is going to be a change of pace so I am giving it 5 Stars

But wait there’s more….

So remember I told you that the opening scene looks like a 70’s horror movie? Well it is…sort of. The movie used in the opening of Signal is a little film called “The Hap Hapgood Story” And it’s featured in the DVD extra’s. It a short film only 10 minutes long but is one of the most frightening movies I have seen in a long time.

Hapgood pays homage to the horror movies of the 70’s it’s the kind of horror I grew up with and it’s the type of horror that I prefer.

“The Hap Hapgood Story” scared me more than The Signal so it also gets 5 Stars

That’s a 40-dollar value!

There are three other short films included on the DVD they are all shorter versions and different perspectives of the feature film and each is called Transmissions. Transmission 14: Technical Difficulties, Transmission 23: The Return and Transmission 37: Crosstown Traffic. My favorite of the three is Transmission 23: The Return but all of them are pretty brutal.

5 Stars for Transmission 23: The Return and 3 ½ Stars for Transmissions 14 & 34