From the Mind of Master Imaginationist Crystal Connor ~"A Trusted Name in Terror."

The Darkness, Artificial Light, In The Valley of Shadows

Thursday, August 5, 2010

The Girl in the Cloak by Molly V.

So I was hired by an author to offer ghostwriting and story structure services, and at 11years old she is my youngest client so far. When she 1st started talking about the idea my very 1st thought was no.

Hold on…let me explain.

The lifestyle I enjoy does not present opportunities for me to interact with children on a consistent basis. The 1st half of my adult life was spent employed and jet setting as a sailor and I cuss like one. Because of me one of her very 1st sentences was “fucking blanket.” And trust me when I tell you this, her father was not at all pleased. Let’s not forget, as all of you are well aware, the fact I am entertained by the unsettling and the macabre and that’s the way I express my self creatively. So that’s why I was thinking that maybe I wasn’t the right person for her.

But as I listened to her plot line I realized three things that changed my mind. First off I can not tell you how incredibly awesome it feels to have someone completely trust you enough to completely hand over their work, and that fact alone changed my mind.

The 2nd thing is if I can pull this off, and by that I mean, taking her ideas and writing a story that is age appropriate in content, language, and dialog and making this story exactly how she images it, that was catapult my skills as a writer.

And the 3rd is developing better people skills. The clients who hire me thru Seattle Crystal Concierge don’t really care how I get the things they want done, as long as I get them done. So basically I’m working the way that I want and doing the things that best for me. When I hire someone to do a job for me whether it be an employee, intern, outside vendor or contractor I expect for things I want done to be done without question, and when it comes to my writing you can times that expectation by infinity. So with this new client I now have to wear that shoe on the other foot.

Because there is no way on God’s green earth that I will be able to speak to her the way I’ve been known to speak to adults without having her mother put a gun to my head and pulling the trigger, I’m kind of looking forward to this project.

I need to be able to interact with children, understand them at their level, and be aware of their presence so that my friends don’t cringe every time I start talking. I need to be able to knock it down a notch and write a creepy little story that the whole family can enjoy, I mean for the love of God, The Skeleton Key with Kate Hudson is rated PG-13. The more I think about it the more and more I’m glad that I said yes!

She has given me permission to post her both her story and what I’ve added to it on my blog, and hopefully she’ll post it on hers as well. With out further a due let me present to you the 1st section of Molly V's: The Girl in the Cloak

Molly's Raw Talent:

“I was a happy little girl...”Rain started to say. “I was lost in a forest fire and my parents did not send a rescue search party for me”She looked up at the night sky.then she closed her eyes.”then when they found me,the put me with new parents,witch made me stressed.then when i was 17,i left.”She paused and then continued to speak."but when I had my real dad, he gave me a black cloak and magic buttons.I thought he was joking...”she opened her eyes and stared down at the cloaks button."my new mom said to through it away,but I said a plain “No”.she started to yell at me.”She sighed.”then one night I left with my white t-shirt,torn jeans,converse and my cloak.then thats when I turned evil.”she opened her mouth and felt her sharp fang.

Molly's Cloak with my devilish details:

Rain was walking through the dark quiet forest; she took long deep breaths to draw in the fresh air of the night.

Rain had been a happy girl and she smiled to herself when her fingers ran across one of the buttons on the cloak her father had given her. When he gave her black cloak he mischievously told her that the buttons were magic and then they both started laughing because Rain mistakenly thought her dad was joking.

A tear left her eye as she looked up at the night sky and then closed her eyes. When Rain had been a young girl she and her family were camping in this forest. They had pitched their tent and gone to bed. But it wasn’t the sun that woke them up, it was the noise of stampeding animals. When they opened the tent to see what was going on they saw deer, a huge black bear and four mountain lions all running together.

Rain thought that it was very scary for animals running next to the ones that they would normally hunt, when she turned to see why all the animals were running together and her answer came before she could ask it. The forest was on fire.

In the fear and confusion for survival Rain and her parent got separated. When she was running for her life Rain tripped and fell into a deep muddy ditch. She hit her head and passed out. Because everything around the trench Rain had fallen into was wet, it saved her from the fire.

Rain was awakened by the panic shouts in her ear and light slaps on her face of a firefighter, and it wasn’t until she was in the hospital that she learned her parents had perished. Rain enjoyed walking alone in the woods because it gave her time to think but really it was because this was the last place that she had been with her family.

Rain’s extraordinary beauty was a gift from her parent, but since their death it had become Rain’s curse. Her foster mother was so mean to her that Rain was willing to bet that Cinderella lived a better life. Her foster mother was always telling Rain how ugly she was, fed her the smallest meals, and forced her to sit at the table and watch her real children eat large meals and delicious looking deserts that made her mouth water and her stomach growl.

One night of her 17th birthday her little foster brother opened the closet door to where Rain was force to sleep. He looked very sad and scared at the same time. Tucked secretly away in his pajama bottoms was a half eaten fried chicken breast and a piece of smushed chocolate cake. Way more food than she had been given for dinner.

Both children started to cry and through her tears Rain ate the chicken so fast she almost chocked. Rain had only taken two bites of the sweet cake when the wicked evil witch queen snatched open the door. She was so mad that she slapped her real son in the face really hard two times in a row. Then she grabbed Rain by the hair and dragged her down the stairs and threw her outside into the rainy night. Rain was only wearing a torn pair of jeans and a t-shirt. She ran across the back yard and got inside the doghouse to keep dry.

One of the girls threw Rain’s black high-top Converse out of her bedroom window down to her, when she left the cover of the horrible smelling doghouse to get the shoes the next thing the girl had thrown out of the window made Rain stand still, barefoot and breathless in the freezing rain. It was her black cloak.

From the very beginning the wicked evil witch queen had tried to steel and destroy Rain’s cloak, and Rain had not seen it for years, so to see it floating down to the ground like snow from heaven meant that one of the girls had hidden it away and kept it safe. This made Rain both very grateful and very sad at the same time.

She retrieved her shoes and cloak and put them on, she turned to look into the bedroom window and knew all three of her foster sisters and brother was watching her from the dark. She kissed her hand and threw the kiss towards the window, repeated the act with her other hand, then she put her hands flat together like she was praying and took a bow of thanks.

She pulled the hood of her cloak up over her head and turned and walked away. Her foster siblings knew that they would never see Rain again and as she walked through the gate to promised safety she could hear them cry.

As Rain walked away from her little private Hell on earth she smiled revealing for the 1st time since her parents death her long sharp fangs, and that was the night Rain decided to use her father’s gift of magic for evil.
***

She loves it so far and approved of almost everything, I have to remove the word Hell. Doh! You can take the girl out of the sea...

Please check back every Monday as the approved sections will be update and posted =D

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